y'know, avril lavigne sounds a lot like dolores mary o'riordan burton, the lead singer for the cranberries...
traffic sucks.
y'know, if people were polite, all went a reasonable speed and didn't weave, there probably wouldn't be as much of a traffic problem as there is. especially if people stopped using the exit only lane as a passing lane to get by all the other cars, then trying to jump in to normal lanes at the last moment. argh.
so many people rant about political and world news in their blogs - sometimes it makes me feel like mine is a little self-centered. perhaps it is. on the other hand, the thought of random people being kidnapped and beheaded just to further some fanatics' political cause scares the sh** out of me. i mean, i can't even handle the ugliness that is aimed at me from a resident who thinks i shouldn't park my car in front of the dumpster...and takes it out on me by writing a note filled with foul language and dumping trash on my car. i can't go global on this. i just can't. it overwhelms me and paralyzes me with fear. instead, i focus on taking it one moment at a time and trying to spread a little goodness in my circle of influence.
it's all i can do.
it's so nice to have a morning where there's nothing pressing to do when you get up. granted, i can't sleep as late as i used to - i was up at 9:30 - but it was nice to sit in bed for a little bit, flip through a book and relax.
last night, after the dance - which was a lot fun, i must add - a group of us stopped by denny's to eat and talk. it's been forever since i didn't have to worry about getting home by a certain time so i could get up and go to work the next day. we need to have more dances on the weekends.
a whole new wardrobe
or something like. i had a clothes-trying-on fest late this morning and discovered that i'm able to fit into and look good in stuff i haven't been able to wear in ages. it's a great feeling.
what prompted this? i'm down another pound and a half. according to my scale, i've less than 10 pounds now to my goal weight. :) maybe i will get to wear my pink sequin dress to the mark of excellence awards this year after all!
last night was the last dance at the firehouse - my favorite venue here in san diego. there were tons of people, lots of great dancing, lots of heat (wow. i think that the firehouse was appropriately named - it gets really really hot in there) and a great band. i found out a few days ago that julia, one of my friends from days of college yore is in town for the summer working as a counselor at a horse camp not too far away. she was there last night, too.
after last night and last saturday, i have to admit i've rediscovered my love for blues music. i'm not really sure why that is - perhaps it's growing up in austin. perhaps it's just that i like dancing to it (the counterbalance thing...and lots of great breaks). last saturday a group of us went to tio leo's after lindy by the bay to listen to the freemonts play. what a great great band.
ah music. love of my life however i can get it - dancing, playing, listening. :)
i must admit, i'm getting antsy to move to my new place. i've picked an apartment, got an approximate move-in date...now i just sit and wait. patience never was one of my stronger virtues. as much as i like hanging out with mom, i'm starting to miss being out on my own. i miss all my stuff - especially my full-sized bed. it's kind of fun starting over in a new place too. my decorating style has changed a little bit, so i'm having fun looking around for ideas and inspirations. it will definitely be interesting to look through all the stuff i brought out with me. i bet there'll be quite a few things that i'll decide i don't want anymore now that i've done without them for six months. heh. lots of "why the heck did i move *this*?" moments.
anyway. it's starting over again. change. i like change. it keeps life interesting. just so long as it's the right amount of change. too much and things get a lot out of control. a little out of control is good - keeps me a little off kilter and from getting into a rut.
what i'm listening to. nonstop. what can i say? it actually makes pretty decent music to work to. and, it keeps me from falling asleep. ;)
another step...another found. it sounded so easy: take a class, take a test, be a notary. oh yeah, by the way, you have to take an oath. and be fingerprinted. and take all this stuff to the county clerk's office. and wait. and wait some more. and send off your commission to the stamp maker to get your stamp. on then, if you're lucky, will you too be a notary. good thing i'm not in a hurry!
this morning was a monthly weigh/measure day - i'm down another four pounds over the last month. i haven't really seen any results yet from this stupid 6-week challenge diet thing, but i think the dancing has been helping. ;) it's good. dance a little more, lose a little more weight, fit into more of my dance clothes. it's a great spiral that i'm happy to be on. :) as for the diet, well, i'm quite ready to be on to other foods. i now know why most people don't eat plain yogurt. it tastes nasty, even if you do mix strawberries into it. :p i miss in'n'out!
amazing how much more difficult it is to function when you've got a migraine poking you in the top of your head. it isn't so much the pain - that comes and goes. it's the slow-as-molasses reaction times, the fuzziness and the memory lapses that get to me. so i'm pretty much useless today at work. probably would have been more productive at home. i've had it since yesterday afternoon, but it's been worse today.
bummer too, 'cause tonight is the first night back of neimans and my usual balboa lessons, and i really want to do neither. i'd be more likely to drag myself up to neimans and at least listen to music than i would be to go to lessons. and that's horrible of me 'cause i know i'm going to miss next week due to the bbq thing that's happening at my uncle's before he plays at neimans. oh well. not like i'm learning anything that's just really wild and new at lessons.
blah. did i mention that today is day one of the 6-week challenge thing i agreed to do with mom? i'm definitely reluctant today with a headache and being tired and in an icky mood. it's just a lousy day to start a diet.
Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning & loving the world all over again. That's what takes a real hero.
Are you a princess? I said & she said I'm much more than a princess but you don't have a name for it yet here on earth.
I spent a long time trying to find my center until I looked closely one night & found it had wheels & moved easily in the slightest breeze, so now I spend less time sitting & more time sailing.
there was a fire inside a bridge yesterday and they closed the freeway. yes. *inside* the bridge support column. oh, *that* makes me feel safe. it's like 100 feet tall...and hollow. and being retrofitted for earthquakes. somehow, i just assumed it was solid concrete and stable.
maybe i'll take another route downtown until they get everything sorted out...
"i [heart] trash"
-- a very dirty sticker barely seen on the back of a garbage truck
hehe.
"do not lift by bumper"
-- sticker seen on the back bumper of a school bus
rats. i was going to test the effectiveness of my workout later today by picking up the back end of a school bus; however, my arms aren't long enough to reach the axle, so i guess i'll have to lift something else.
really. who lifts a bus up by the bumper?
"I wasn't brave," I confessed. "I wanted to cry or throw up or run out of the room."
"Yes, but you did it anyway - that's called bravery. It's not about how you feel; it's about how you act."
--Terry Miller Shannon (c) 1998 from Chicken Soup for the Teacher's Soul by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen.
i'm now an official california resident again, voting registration and all. i still had to take half the written test, but i didn't miss one question. i would hope not. i've been driving for 12 years now. :p
i heard today that there's a 2 br/1 ba coming available in the complex that i'm supposed to be the on-site for. bonus/minus that it's right by the front gate, but it would make it easier to see who all is coming and going on the property. it's not available until aug 6, but that might work out for the best anyway. i can't move jul 31 because that's our family reunion weekend...it'll all work out, i'm sure. it would definitely be nice to have a craft room/office...which would leave me with a dining area as well.
speaking of, from the 'sad but true' file, the rest of my summer seems to be planned out. looks like i might have a free weekend or two to maybe be able to steal away to disneyland to go dancing. i hope. otherwise, there will be lots of trips to the del mar fair, a family reunion up at the cabin, and a friend's bridal shower. never a dull moment, i say. i have to find a moment or two to move sometime, too!
so people might think i'm going a little overboard, but i danced six nights last week. i only missed sunday because i had a killer headache when i got up in the morning. six nights. must be why i've dropped 8 pounds since january...and 2 pounds in the last week and a half.
i've had so much fun, though. the people out here are so nice, and it's great to just get out and dance and have fun and forget about trying to impress people who saw you as a beginner. i can have an off night and shrug it off and laugh. i had one of those this last week, but it didn't stop me.
work is busy. sleep is rare. working out is still going on at 6am. i've done a month and not lost any momentum. let's see if i can keep it up after i move. unless something else comes available, looks like i'll be in a one-bedroom downstairs unit. but hey, it's place of my own, and it's not like i'm home a lot anyway! :)