"...Lord, help thou my unbelief." (mark 9:24)
one thing i have always admired madeleine l'engle for is her frankness about her "atheistic periods" in her life - the times when she has trouble believing for one reason or another, the times when she is mad at God. i expect that it would be difficult to believe 100% of the time; i know i have never been able to do so. there are things that happen that, on the surface, make no sense, that fly in the face of your belief, that make you doubt. sometimes it's revealed later on why something has happened, sometimes it isn't. still, it's hard in the muddle of things to be unshaken.
c.s. lewis said that "simply to say prayers is not to pray," however, sometimes in those atheistic periods, continuing to say those prayers, with (or without) the faintest glimmer of hope that perhaps someone/something higher is listening, is the best you can do. continuing to pray is an act of faith in and of itself - you can't get all the way to God by yourself. faith is about reaching out to him through your unbelief so he can reach out to you and "help your unbelief."
i suppose that is why i'm glad the episcopal church has a prayer book for services and daily use. there are times when i don't have the words or even thoughts to pray, and it loosens my tongue.
Posted by kendra at February 9, 2006 08:00 AMvery cool...and so true!
Posted by: Kayla at February 10, 2006 10:25 PMit's a comfort to know that even when we don't have words to pray, that the Spirit groans for us.
also, to have a book of prayer as part of our faith tradition, or even the psalms themselves, helps us follow the trail of those people of faith who've gone-- and struggled-- and overcame--long before we showed up.
Posted by: Carl at February 17, 2006 11:48 AM